Freddie Dog with Hat and SunglassesEvery 365 days people all over the world ring in the New Year with a “Resolution”, or a promise to reduce, change, update, eliminate, better, fix, add, subtract or do something that will make a difference in their lives. The most often used Resolutions are “lose weight”, “get in shape”, “stop smoking”, “be a better (fill in the blank)”, “make more money/get a better job”. The vast majority of resolutions are forgotten or abandoned in less than six weeks after they are made, normally for a laundry list of “not so great” reasons. The actual culprit of why New Years Resolutions fail??? People… Hate… Change! There is no real skin in the game in meaningless resolutions, so the author of the claim have no real desire to stick with the promise they made on January 1. The failed Resolution quickly vanishes, forgotten until the next year when the entire process begins again.

What if your dog or cat could make a resolution?? Not something their non-furry parent forces on them that is doomed to follow the cycle of failure but a real Resolution that the actual animal thought would rock their world and make a positive change in their life?? What, exactly, would those Resolutions sound like?? Well now we have a pretty good idea!

FreddieSez used our back ally relationships and connections with everyday dogs and cats to get a solid grasp on what your pets are thinking on this subject.  We then compiled notes, studied trends, noted similarities and created a short list of the most common answers from both sides of most popular pet worlds. Below are the results we gathered…

Top Five New Years Resolutions from Dogs

1) Eat 

Food was big #1 and a huge buzz in the fuzz butt world. Regardless if it was eat more, eat less, eat better, “only eat my own dinner”, ” eat everybody’s dinner”, eat no more stuff that gives me the poops, no more eating poop, don’t eat throw-up, stop eating the cushions/couch/socks/undies, eat more table food, eat less table food… eating was like the Elvis song “Always on my Mind” for most dogs. The big dog gonna eat (the little ones, too), they just wants more and tastier options. So, look for better and healthier food THAT TASTES GREAT, while offering a high nutritional value in every meal. Chef Mom & Dad need to lend a helping hand to assure success can be had in this Resolution. Dog’s can’t cook for themselves, or I promise you they would… all the time! The internet has great resources on what to feed and what to avoid. Click here to read our FreddieSez post regarding food.

2) Sleep

A promise to nap less was mentioned second most by canines surveyed. research says, on average, adult dogs sleep 13.5 hours a day. More than HALF of their day is spent asleep! Do you know why??? Rover, Jake, Tiger and Golden Boy want you to know it’s because, “You’re boring, dude”. How much college basketball can you possibly watch? Get off your device and into your doberman, buddy! Between not engaging your dog and people being gone between 15 seconds and 5 years every time you leave the room (that’s the pesky “dogs have no real concept of passing time” theory coming into play), dogs are twiddling their non-existent thumbs most of the day, so why not nap?? I know I would.

If you’re a human on the go and are going to be out and about all day, provide some source of entertainment for your pooch. Try some noise (TV, radio, music), hire a dog walker or have a friend stop by to visit and break up the boredom. Your dog can’t build a model ship, read a book or put together puzzle (that no thumbs barrier, again). Help a Beagle out, man!! Make your home a dog friendly and fun dog zone. The more they are active, the happier they will be.

3) Lose Weight

Carrying too much weight is unhealthy and bad for your four legged friends, just like your work buddies. Oh don’t think your dog doesn’t hear you snicker when you snap off those clandestine camera pictures as they lay on their back. Then you post to Facebook or Instagram with the caption “My Fat Fido” or “is it a dog or a sheep? You decide”. When your pet checks their social media profiles, I assure you, they are not amused!

Since dogs can’t join the local gym, can’t do squat thrusts or sign up for a colon cleansing, they are depending on their parents to provide guidance in the form of diet and exercise. Walks, hikes. better and healthier food, supplements, vitamins and a game plan to weight loss is key to helping your fur kid reach their goal of their slim puppy like figure, again. Don’t forget positive reinforcement, as well, a kind word of encouragement goes a long way to keep tails wagging and focus on the prize. Remember, nobody wants to be called “Heavy Henry” or “Large Marge”. By being their weight loss coach and #1 fan, any realistic goal is achievable. Help them see the goal and you be their goal post. Go team Slender!

4) Kill Fewer Toys

Yea, there is a general feel of shame on this topic. No good boy or girl wants to gut a brand new, fresh from the package, squeaky toy. That toy has not had time to be completely drenched in drool, ran through any available muck or tossed around and pounded into submission. The simple truth is… your pup can’t help it, it’s that confounded high pitched noise that gets them every time. It’s like an itch that gets inside their head, just out of reach of a good ear scratching, but they can’t reach and it never stops, it goes round and round until… auuuuuggghhhh!!!

To help curve the desire to murder their toys, surveyed dogs suggest more non-squeaking plush variety victims, I mean toys. You know, the kind of toys that are silent but might have weird, smug and taunting expressions on their faces. Those little smirks that mock your dog every time they glance over from where they are peacefully and quietly relaxing, having no malice or anger towards anyone. Then suddenly that JERK TOY gives one of those mocking looks with those eyes and that OH SO sly smile grinning, all toothy and smug. What choice does a good dog have… you try to ignore it, look away but there’s that FACE, that JERK IS BEGGING FOR IT and suddenly you’re up and … auuuuuuggghhhhhhh!!!

On a second and more complete review, this Resolution might be harder to achieve than first considered. A dog might need therapy to get by the emotional damage these toys have made over the years!


5) More Love

Love is a two way street of give and receive. Your dog resolves to love, even more unconditionally. All they expect in return is the same. Remember, the key to success is unconditional love. You are parent, best friend, cook, teacher, defender, lawyer, playmate, the sun, the moon and the stars to your dog. You are EVERYTHING, all the time, in one package… ultimately, how cool is that?

Consider this, does your human significant other follow you from room to room, even the bathroom? Do your fleshy friends sleep at your feet, listen to any stupid thing you have to say, jump in the car with you and not ask or care where you’re going, ignore your faults and excuse your quirks? Who else eats all your leftovers, eliminates the pizza crusts and wipes up spills in real time, with their mouth… and has zero complaints, in fact they enjoy it? Waking up and being with you is the best part of your dogs day and they experience that joy four or five times every day (back to the “no concept of passing time” theory). No other place in your life can you find, count on or revel in the joy that your dog love brings, I challenge you to match it. All that is asked in return is the same level of compassion and love.

So, slow down your life when you can, shut down the outside interference, focus on the moment and just enjoy your dog while you can. Their lives are a short walk down a long and beautiful path, don’t waste a minute of that walk with them! Let the wash of their unconditional love overtake you and be sure they realize that YOU SEE THEM for  who they are, you appreciate their uniqueness and are happy they are there. Allow them to realize that they are every bit as important to you as you are to them… if not, you are missing half the adventure and that is squarely on you. You don’t want to look back someday and be sorry your Resolution wasn’t “I wish I had spent more time with my dog”, you can’t get that one back once its gone.

Oh sure, there were more suggested resolutions that were popular across many dogs. For instance… Stop fighting, Share more, Get fresher breath, Understand NO in more detail, Ask for a name change, Stop peeing on the rug, Don’t chase the UPS driver… those kinds of things. Our research shows that dogs, as a whole, are pretty self aware. They just lack discipline, a common shared language with their people… and thumbs. If dogs had thumbs, who would have who on a leash??? Makes you wonder.

Top New Years Resolutions from Cats

1) Continue plans for World Domination 

I’m not sure if we were supposed to hear this but more than one cat interviewed mentioned completing World Domination as their Resolution and then uncomfortably laughed it off as a common joke all cats make. We suggest cat parents might want to monitor any strange gatherings of more than six cats, unusual files that appear on their computers or any high data usage or strange numbers on their mobile phones found in 2023. This might be the year cats finalize their plans and make their move to take over the world. Just when we thought 2020, 2021 and 2022 were unusual.

Beyond that, it appears that, universally, cats think they don’t have room for improvement. However,  they are willing to critique their people, in great detail. It seems very few of you are up to cat standards and could be working a lot harder to provide them the things they expect and, in many cases, demand. The following were mentioned most often by the majority of those cats interviewed…

– Feed me on time, which is when I want to eat. Stop trying to put me on a schedule. You’re not the boss of me! Stop feeding me what you’re feeding me, I might have liked it yesterday, in fact, I might have like it today but it doesn’t mean I like it NOW. Be intuitive and anticipate my needs but expect to be wrong because you will be.

– Pet me but don’t really touch me while you’re petting me and only pet me when I say and only pet me on the places I approve at this time. Be aware that the places, time and frequency can change in at a moments notice or with no notice. You don’t know me, get over it,

– Are you kidding me? No, just in general. I’m sure you’re ready to do something to offend me, so stop already. I know I told you to anticipate but you should have anticipated I didn’t really mean that.

– You should be happier to see me when you get home, show it… but from a distance. No further away,… further… closer.. no further. I will let you know when it’s appropriate to adore me and for how long but expect it won’t be very long. Just look at me with an acceptable level of joy. If its too much joy, I’ll disappear for a week, but you’ll still hear me and I’ll expect to eat but not ever see you. Make it happen.

– Don’t use baby talk with me, my ancestors sat at the right hand to throne of Egypt, you peasant. I can suck the breath out of your body and summon a mummy. Keep that in mind the next time you are slow to scoop my litter or think it’s “to early to feed me”. My eyes glow in the dark for a reason, and its not to light up the hallway so you can see at night!

– You’ll do for now but keep in mind that I always leave my options open and I’m continually reviewing resumes. One of us is replaceable and it’s not me. No, that’s not a threat. I have claws for a threat.

I’m sure ALL cats don’t think this way… but don’t they, really??

As a closing note, we want San Diego County residents to know that Freddie’s Place can assist in any help you need in “Keeping the Ball Rolling” on New Years Resolutions you set with your fur babies. Our staff can council on weight loss, better dental health, or an overall wellness plan for 2023 and beyond.

From all of us here at FreddieSez, here’s to a Happy and Healthy start to the New Year for everyone out there on the internet. We hope 2023 brings health, wealth and joy to all of Freddie’s online Fam… two and four legged.

Let us know if you have comments, question or have a great idea for us for a future blog. We’d love to hear from you! We’ll talk at you next time from FreddieSez Central!